After the Teacher training session, Ms Lucking felt she had a whole lot more to say and asked if she could write to the equalities group. Here’s her letter:
18/11/2015
17:59
Dear Equalities Group
I wanted to write a few words to say how grateful I was and am for your INSET earlier this evening.
Not only was it a thoughtful presentation but has definitely intensified a debate (for myself at the very least) with regard to the last of your role plays.
I know that the intention was to allow the female voice to be heard on this matter. However it was illuminating in how we then were not making ourselves heard.
For me I think that the way we were asked became too confrontational/masculine in approach and therefore we reverted to type. We need perhaps a different forum to air these feelings and opinions ( I am emailing..) or at least begin to air these feelings and thoughts before more of us are ready to speak.
It felt that we didn’t have a lot to say but actually we do.
I feel that we are hyper aware of getting along with men in the workplace for pure survival so it has become difficult to openly voice our opinions/feelings on matters relating to sexism.
There were points I agreed with and others I disagreed with, although I understand where they are coming from… a comment about when sexist comments are challenged it being more powerful if coming from men and not us.
Across the board it needs to be said.
How we all say it will be different but still it needs to be said. That’s ok. We all response differently and it makes us interesting and unique.
Role models of all genders are important for this.
I am no less powerful in saying it than a male.
To say yes implies we are less than other genders and I am not willing to give away my female power (particularly when it is so hard fought for every day).
The older I get the more I am attuned to it. I grew up in a different environment in an all girls school which set no limits on what women could do…we can rule the world….that was the norm. I want that outlook for all girls and boys to be the norm. Society depresses me in regard to this. I fully understand how using the word girl in a negative way towards a boy highlighting perceived faults is constraining and limiting to the boys as well as offensive about and to women. Not allowing for expression outside of ‘male’ parameters is tremendously harmful to personal growth and your point at the end was so appropriate.
I think that this issue was also evidenced tonight by the female staff. Women are so used to being told to constrain themselves to be more like men, at work, to get ahead, that the constraints meant we couldn’t really cope with the discussion. Not yet. Often we go to default…which is humour to disperse the issue. Doesn’t deal with it though. And we couldn’t do that tonight so therefore alot of food for thought.
I have 2 young boys and I am very aware that I do not want them to have that attitude growing up.
I want for students (&staff) to be comfortable in expressing themselves however they wish and for these expressions to be valued as such.
Setting the example is key. If there is to be change we must become the change.
I was surprised that male staff did not really discuss this issue. I could see they were waiting for us to provide an answer however we roll differently and this needs much, much more work.
Thank you so much once again
Kind regards
Miss Lucking
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